The Journey Home - September 8, 2012

When you look back at the who crazy process of adopting from Haiti it is amazing that you get to the end of the process with some sanity left.  The stress of adopting from Haiti is unlike anything that I have ever experienced.  The constant lack of information and feeling of uncertainty tends to push the most faithful to the breaking point. I know that even though we had completed everything and had US approval there was still as sense of foreboding.  An unmistakable feeling of apprehension.  What else could go wrong?  That was a question we asked ourselves time and time again as we were packing for Haiti.

The day was finally here!  It was September 8th and we were leaving Knoxville at 5:55 AM to fly to Atlanta.  We would be meeting the rest of the team in Atlanta for the flight to PAP later in the morning.  Lynn Steele, Victoria Smith, Christy and I would be traveling together on the first leg.  In Atlanta we would meet Brock, Kevin, Nayia, Ke Ke, Jason, Kojak, Shauna, Breezy, and Grampsie.  Billy was flying American and would go through Ft. Lauderdale.  There were 14 total.

Christy and I had barely slept.  We were very excited and could not wait to get going.  We checked in at the counter, went through the security screening, and then had a seat at the gate just waiting on our departure time.  We boarded the plane and found our seats and just sat back for the ride.  There was a weather system moving through Atlanta  so our flight was a bit bumpy but we made it safely to Atlanta.   Christy went to Starbuck's and got us some coffee and we settled in to wait on the rest of the team.  Our flight for PAP would be leaving at 11:30 AM.   The rest of the team made it safely to Atlanta and joined us at the gate for departure.  We spent the morning sharing stories and eating our last American meals for 7 days.  Then it was time to leave.  We boarded the plane and the final leg of our journey to pick up Berline began.

The flight to PAP was uneventful.  It is amazing that I get the same feeling every time on approach to PAP.  You look out the window, see Haiti and you feel like you are home.  It is a feeling of excitement and adventure knowing that God is solely in control of the experiences you are going to have.

Toussaint Loverture airport is best described as chaos.  You get off the plane and then move to a ground transport vehicle which takes you to immigration and the terminal.  Once in the terminal you gather your bags and say "No" to 10 different Haitians who want to carry your bags and then move out of the airport into the waiting parking lot.  On the walk out you pass by at least 100 Haitians who stare at you.  It is arguably the most difficult part of any trip to Haiti.  I have done it 5 times and it still is a challenge to negotiate things smoothly.

I was last to make it to the PCAP truck.  I stopped and purchased a Digicel phone in the kiosk near the end of the walk way.  The phone cost about $20 US.  When I got to the truck everyone was standing around saying their Hellos to Mona, Alfred, Jean Luc, and Deltha.  It was good to see old friends.  We boarded the PCAP truck and started on our way to Mme Samuel's house.

A New Life Style --Savanna

I knew life would be different when Berline came home, but little did I know that it would change this drastically.  Berline being home has had a drastic impact on not only my home life but also how I view everything else in my life.  The smallest things that we take for granted, she enjoys so much and she is always so happy.  I loved being a big sister before she was home, to Emma, but now that I once again have a little sister, it makes me so appreciative that God has prepared our family for this.  Yes, at times, I just want to tell her to hush or I wished she understood everything I was saying but that is also part of the joy in having her around.  She's so witty to be so young and it is hilarious when I explain something to her and she just looks at me like i'm an idiot, and of course i've been the popular one at school.  Everyone wants to come to my house to meet her because she's all I talk about, and I love having the support from my friends and teachers at school.  She has showed me a patience I didn't think i'd ever have and i'm so grateful and humbled that God chose our family to make such a huge impact on a little girl's life.  

Finally Home

We were welcomed home to the airport by over 100 people awaiting our arrival.  She greeted everyone there. I was so impressed by her social skills at that moment.  When we left, she wanted to know where her house was, she stared out the car window the entire time.  When we arrived home, she was all smiles.  She opened every door, closet, and stared at everything.  It was such a joy to watch her discover everything including the pictures on the wall. 
Some favorites: bananas- I've found banana peels everywhere including her room and the backyard, spaghetti with lots of sauce, french fries with lots of ketchup, chick fil a nuggets, popsicles, eggs, toast with butter and jelly, cereal of any kind, KFC slaw, orange juice,bath time, the balloon people outside and ice cream, especially birthday cake, eventhough she first spit the sprinkles in the floor.  Some dislikes: green beans, mashed potatoes, cheese, olives, any kind of sandwich meat, and the cold weather. 

She has been a joy in everyway.  She sleeps 10-11 hours a night, when she gets stress, she wants to sleep.  30 minutes at Walmart was more than enough.  We did leave with 3 boxes of cereal and a Rapunzel doll though.  Garage saling was fun.  It was a joy to watch her purchase a pink purse, and a new bicycle.  It was a real learning experience for her to purchase her own items.  Apparently bicycle in creole is bacon.  Mwen vle bacon means, I want to go outside and ride my bike NOT I want to eat bacon!  It took a while to figure that one out.  She has slept with Savanna, Emma or us everynight.  Emma seems to be winning out more than the rest of us.  She goes to Emma's ballgames and sits and watches patiently.  She buckles her self into the car.  She loves watching Dora and Disney movies.  She absolutely loves the trampoline.  Sparkly clothes and headbands are always a preference over ones that aren't sparkly.

We are so blessed.

Thursday, September 13, 2012

Yesterday we walked to Berline's grandmas house. It was a group God put together for this trip. Dad, Billy, Brock (god father of Bradley-her cousin), Jason (took food to Ti-Jacque -another cousin right after he was born in 2010), Rob, Franswa ( our dear friend and interpreter). We walked the trail and climbed the mountains. There are 2 real mountains you go up to reach her house. Rob carried a 50lb bag of rice the entire way. Brock carried a bag of baby food. We took 2 big bags full of clothes, candles, kitchen utensils, food, shoes, and treats. When we finally arrived, Amanese, her grandma, welcomed us with open arms. She was so grateful to see us.  After a warm greeting and handing out gifts, Edna, her aunt, shows us Ti Jacques's legs. One leg has 3 nickel size yucky sores. The other leg has 2. I wash them with wipies and put on some antibiotic ointment and cover with band aids. Later we found out from Agathe that they were a type of worm like ringworm he often gets from playing in the dirt. Amanese carries water for over an hour each directions. You can't blame her for not keeping the baby boy clean.
We feel we have to do something to help them out.  God will not hold me accountable for suffering in Haiti, but I believe God will hold me accountable for suffering to my new family when he has made us aware of their basic needs.  Rob, Dad, Billy and Brock have already begun conversations on returning and building a structure with some type of guttering and rain water collection to ease their burdens.  We are praying for provisions and abilities for their future.

The Beginning of the End!

Early August 2012

It's amazing how God puts things in perspective for you and creates beauty out of chaos.  We got the email that we had been waiting on during the past 21 months.  The US Embassy had approved our I-604 and Berline now had to complete the Consular Doctor's appointment and the Visa appointment.  Our Visa interview was scheduled for Monday, August 27 at 10:30 AM.  I called Jabet Renard, our beloved Haitian friend, and confirmed that he would be able to take her for the interview.  He said, "Okay, my friend! No problem!" which he says to every question I ask him.  I emailed him a copy of the documents sent by the US Embassy and we waited. 

Everything went smoothly.  Berline went to the Consular Doctor and there were no issues then Jabet took her for the Visa interview which was completed without any problems.  Her Visa would be ready in less than 48 hours.  Christy and I were amped to be at the end of the process.  There was still one little issue that had to be resolved prior to traveling home.  We had to have IBESR authorization to travel.  Our primary hurdle in getting authorization was ensuring that our Haitian Attorney would be in Haiti to complete the process.  Mme Cyprien has a tendency to go on extended breaks to France, the US, and Africa.  Timing was everything.  I emailed her and she said it would be completed without any problems.  Which means that it may or may not be done when you get to Haiti. 

When do we go to Haiti became the pressing question.  Christy and I began discussing our options then out of nowhere God created beauty out of chaos for us.  The Boys and Girls Club proposed using a Taco Bell disaster relief grant to take a team of kids to Haiti to support building projects in Coq Chante.  The plan was to partner with Whitestone Church and leave for Haiti on September 8.  Christy and I were both excited to find out that we would have an opportunity to spend a week in the orphanage prior to bringing Berline home.  We believed that it would help her transition to the United States and into our family.  Crazy as it seems we were willing to wait an additional two weeks to go pick her up after waiting 21 months to get to this point.  Looking back on it now I am glad that we did.  That was possibly the best 7 days I have ever spent in Haiti!

We wait, one more time.

People ask "how do you do this?, how do you wait?" I have no idea.  I can only say sometimes I close my eyes and repeat the lyrics of a beautiful praise song that simply says, "Strength will rise as we wait upon the Lord". 

Last week was her birthday and we celebrated with a phone call spanning 1400 miles.  Again.  The past 4 months have been long and trying.  Each week we would get news that we should hear something next week and again next week.  In early July, we finally got her passport to the US embassy, only to find out the translations hadn't made it.  A week later, the translations were delivered and we were finally in into US hands.  We received one email from the embassy on her birthday Friday, July 27 requesting the second page translations of 3 documents. We knew we had turned everything in but we didn't realize there was a 2nd page to 3 documents we never received for translation.  It took us about 3 hours to get this complete and returned to the embassy. Then we wait.  Again. 

Three families with girls from the same orphanage who have walked this path alongside us will be home on Thursday, only 2 days away.  Maeva, Berline's buddy is one of these.  Merline, another little girl whose family has been in this process for 28 months, will be home on the 17th of this month.  I have continually ask God to bring this beautiful girl home to her family.  They have struggled so much along their journey.  We hoped we would hear soon.  It was our turn.  It was Berline's turn now.  As other families got visa appointments and doctor appointments and made airline reservations home, we wait. Again. 

Yesterday at 3:09 we received an e-mail from the embassy stating we were approved and the appointment for Berline Jeudy Cummings is Monday, August 27.  Finally, there is an answer to the magic question "When is she coming home?" Finally, our family will be complete.

Between now and August 27, Berline will have a doctor appointment from an Embassy doctor which includes a tb test before her visa appointment.  After the Visa appointment, we will need to wait about a week for her to get an authorization to travel from the Haitian government and a couple of days for the US embassy to print her visa. 

We aren't booking plane tickets yet, but we hope we will have our girl home the first or second week in September.  For now, I will wait.  Again.  But this time I can breathe a little easier. 

2 weeks with my baby girl-by Christy

March 17-31, 2012

Emma and I left for Atlanta at midnight on Friday, March 17.  We were blessed to have Naomi along with us for a 2 week visit to the orphanage.  Whitestone was taking 2 Saturday to Saturday trips back to back and we were blessed to be able to stay both weeks.  We finally made it to the orphanage late afternoon on Saturday.  Berline was standing in the doorway with a huge smile on her face awaiting our arrival.  She immediately came to me and Emma.  It was pure joy to be with her again.  It took a few minutes to get acquainted again, but not near as long as recent trips.  It was as if she and Emma had never been separated. It was so great to see all the girls.  I am so thankful I can greet them all by name and have real relationships with them all.  It is amazing how much love God allows me to have for these little girls I have spent so few days with.

We spent the next few days just enjoying being together.  All the girls loved the I spy books I brought.  Chilove and Christila loved the animal book and enjoyed asking me which ones were "in Tennessee".  When I told the girls a killer whale was as big as 4 cars, Guerline smiled and said "noooo".  The innocents of these girls is so beautiful.  Benette is the happiest child I have ever been around.  She is in a constant state of joy.

Berline loved Emma's iPad, her new dresses and clothes I brought her, and really enjoyed her chocolate pop tarts. She slept between Emma and I that first week.  She still loves to sleep.  I love how her little head hits the pillow and she is asleep within minutes.  She says in her tiny little voice "good night Emma, good night mommi, good night Naomi", every night before going to sleep.  She is so much more comfortable with us than past trips.  She is ready to come home with us.

Rob called on Wednesday to say "She is officially a Cummings". He had heard from Rico earlier Wednesday morning that the adoption degree had been published the previous Monday.  This was huge news and meant that our paper work was moving again and we could see a small light at the end of the tunnel.

I got to walk Berline to school on Monday.  I was so excited to see John, her brother.  When he saw me, he just grinned his meek grin.  It's beautiful how you fall in love with someone so easy when you pray for them diligently.  It was great to see her uncle John Gary.  I ask them to tell Amanise, grandmother, that I would see her at church on Sunday.

It was a difficult week after Tuesday.  Savanna had called and told me that Brenna, Vance and 3 other friends had been in a very serious car accident.  It was so hard to be away from my Savanna when I knew she was suffering so much.  Vance would be fine, but one month later, we are still waiting to see if Brenna will completely recover.  It was a blessing that Savanna had planned on coming down on that Saturday.  She needed to escape the situation where she had no control and spend her energy loving on little girls.

The first team left on Saturday morning.  Berline spent the day singing "Poppi veni la Samdi", Savanna veni la Samdi", Grandmommi veni la Samdi".  Poppi, Savanna, Grandmommi is coming on Saturday.  They arrived around 3:30 on Saturday. She was so excited to see her Poppi and Savanna.  I loved watching Savanna hug Fagueline.  I am ask happy that Fagueline has Savanna as her special friend.  Berline was happy to see her Grampsi and meet her Nina. Berline was the queen all week with her grandparents, sisters, parents and even Aunt April, Uncle Tim and Zeke and Mae, 2 cousins there.

The next week was full of peace for us. Our family was complete even if just for a week.  We went to church at Camatin on Sunday.  I asked John if he wanted to sit with me.  He did.  It was great to see her Grandma.  I was so happy for mom to meet her.  Berline greeted her with a kiss.  She obviously has great respect for her.  I told Grandma we were going to come visit one day that week.  She loved laying on our bed watching Dora on Rob's iPad.  She didn't have school that week due to spring break so we got to spend everyday all day together.  We walked to her Grandma's house on Wednesday.  Her aunt Edna, Ti Jacque, and baby Bradley were the only ones home.  Grandma, John, and John Gary were all working in the fields.  It is the beginning of the rainy season and planting is going on everywhere.  Beans, corn, and potatoes seem to be the most prevalent items. We left a care bag of knives, silverware, clothes for the boys, some candy, candles and a photo album.  We visited the homes of Neica, Cadonia, Maniaca, and Berline that day.  It was a long hard walk up a mountain.  Everytime we stopped to rest, the girls were dancing and skipping around us.  Rob compared them to little mountain goats.

April and her family visited Benia and AngeMarlie's home on Thursday and again on Friday afternoon.  It was obvious that they don't get visitors much.  Benia's family was so happy to see them and so grateful for the small amount of food and trinkets they took them.

We took all the girls to the pool on Friday.   They swam for hours.  We took granola bars, and fruit snacks and bought them 7ups.  They had so much fun.  I love taking the girls to the pool.  I enjoy watching the Haitian adults as much as the kids.  Colby, our interpreter and great new friend, loved the water as much as anyone.

Friday night and Saturday morning were difficult, but not as hard as I imagined.  I know because of the multitude of prayers going up for us during this time of separation.  Colby helped us talk to Berline Friday night and explain to her that we were leaving and she couldn't go with us because yet because of some government papers we still need.  I don't know how much a 6 year old understands "government papers" but we wanted her to understand how much we wanted to take her with us.  We left early Saturday morning.  Both Savanna and Emma cried quiet a bit, but Berline did surprisingly well with our good byes.  The ride down the mountain was long but there was some peace in thinking the next time I saw that mountain it would hopefully be to pick up our little girl and take her home.

We are now waiting on her passport and then a US Embassy appointment.  We are hopeful this will only take a couple of more months but know that isn't necessarily the case.  Just full of hope and faith that her journey home to us will be sooner than later.

Family of 5 together in March 2012

Emma's poem for her Grampsie from our October trip

Haiti, October 2011

Me and Grampsie crossed part of the sea;
and landed on a little island called Haiti.

We rode up the mountain for 3 hours or so,
20 girls waiting my Grampsie they did not know.
Her hair was fuzzy and wild, but
my Grampsie was still thrilled
to meet his newest grandchild.

Swinging and playing 1.2.3.
All of the snacks and the jelly
The clinic was dark, as dark as the night
and Grampsie arrived and said "let their be light."

The day soon came for us to go.
Now we wait.
It seems so slow.

62 days until I return - by Christy

Christmas is a time to be with family and friends and our family was definately incomplete this year.  We all felt the missing piece.  Savanna called the orphanage on Christmas Eve and we talked to Berline for a few minutes.  I think she was excited to get a phone call.  It was full of "Mwen renmen ou (I love you) and Mwen sonje ou (I miss ou)".  I tried to get her to say Merry Christmas, but with no luck.  I just pray this is the last Christmas our family spends with our baby girl not with us.  We heard a few days before New Year's that our paper work had a moved a couple of steps, but as of today, we haven't heard any more.  It is difficult to go weeks, maybe months with no news.  Several groups have been down over the past few weeks and each time, I have sent a care package full of m&m's, pringles, crayons, and Barbies. Eventhough we can't afford to go each trip, I want her to know we are still here thinking about her, praying for her, and anxiously awaiting the day we will be together. 

Emma and I plan on going with Whitestone on back to back trips in March.  We will leave March 17 and return the 31st.  I am ready to spend this time with her.  There are times when I think it's all good and I accept God's timing and then there are times when I miss her so much and just want her here now.  Today, I say 62 days and counting until I see her again.